Okay, enough of that....writing about it is definitely not helping.
Yeah, like I said, it's been bad. I've been very firm in my mindset that this whole thing isn't about a diet for me....it's about changing my habits and choices. And I've done very well with that. But the fact remains that as I change my habits, I have been depriving myself of an abundance of foods I love.
I'm continuing to remind myself of the setbacks indulging too much would result in, and worrying about this coming weigh-in has kept me mostly in check.....but gosh, it's hard.
This journey isn't easy. I never expected it to be. But that doesn't change the reality of the temptations and the pity parties. It sucks.
John recently conquered his first triathlon last weekend, and he told me that what he tells himself when it's hurting the most is-- "Not because it's easy, but because it's hard." For him, that means, the reason he's challenging himself to push through the pain, is just that...it's a challenge. He wants to conquer it, to prove to himself he can finish.
I'm not there yet, but that got me thinking. For me, the reason I say no, the reason I keep depriving myself of the things my body mistakenly thinks it needs, the reason I keep pushing myself in workouts, is -- "Not because it's easy, but because it's worth it."